Job, Home, Man and Engagement Rings - isn't that everyone's checklist?
All female friends, colleagues, relatives and supermarket check-out assistants I know have a designated, and much considered, "scary age". This "scary age" is the age a woman regards as being the day she should finally have her life sorted out by. Great job, great home, great boyfriend, ring on the finger. Those are the usual targets. On the eve of the "scary" birthday, the woman will sit at home with a glass of merlot and assess the situation. These days it seems that the analysis goes something like this. Job: check. Women can pick and choose better and better jobs, move up in companies steadily and (as much as can be expected) enjoy the work. Home: check. No longer do women stay living with their parents until marriage. They can have large, comfortable and welcoming houses of their own. Boyfriend: check. Even though they should know that their girlfriends will be getting depressed tonight and they've gone to watch some football match or another instead staying home to distract us. Engagement rings: zero.
Hmm. Women can almost feel their blood pressures rising as they ponder why the question hadn't been popped months ago. Another glass of vino and it doesn't seem quite so important. We're in love, happy, close and who cares if there's a rock on our finger or not. Three out of four targets met isn't bad. The birthdays dawn as we try to remember where that part bottle of wine was left the night before. Incidentally, after an exhaustive search, the empty bottle can often be found in the bin. While waiting for the kettle to boil for the much needed morning coffee, the boyfriends make an appearance seldom with flowers, chocolates or teddies, but just the post. The already fragile woman is hurtling towards melting point. If there are no engagement rings, who cares about the large manila envelope you've just handed me? Even if there were flight tickets to Bangkok inside and connecting flights to Phuket. This is followed by the brochure of the swanky hotel and a reservation document.
Then, the travellers' cheques, the letter from work approving three weeks' leave, bookings for the cats at the cattery, and your passport. He's thought of everything, and the woman mentally gives herself a slap and thinks how ungrateful she was for the 'who cares' thought a moment ago. If you were going on a surprise dream holiday to Phuket, staying in a stunning hotel and didn't have to go to work for 3 weeks, how could you possibly be disappointed? A million thoughts go through your head while you're packing, not one of which has anything to do with marriage. Instead they are thoughts of tropical beaches, fabulous resorts, amazing food, and how the whole thing had been planned without raising suspicion. Upon arrival at the beach-front hotel, all thoughts of previous nights are replaced by just one. If we are happy, successful and have a boyfriend who would do all this for us, maybe engagement rings are overrated.